Zynella asks: I’m in this relationship and don’t know whether to leave or try more. I feel I don’t get the total care and attention I need. He acts really insecure all the time. Really weird whenever he sees me relating with other male folks. He says he loves me but I really doubt that sometimes. He wants us to remain low-key for now and not trumpet the relationship, and I don’t feel comfortable about that. He’s not introduced me to anyone close to him yet though we’re just a year and some months. He doesn’t like calling, only prefers to chat, and I’m just the other way round. He can be really possessive and authoritative sometimes. He got his heart broken by a lady who left him for someone else and he feels I’m also going to do same whenever I say I’m tired. And what I’m tired of is his behaviors, sometimes to the point of not loving him. I find it difficult to get emotionally attached to people and when I do is always hard to let go. Now I’m on a crossroads of letting go or still hanging on a little more – I don’t know. I still love him very much but this is torture. He’s not violent in anyway and can be very romantic sometimes. Please what do I do?

Zynella asks: I’m in this relationship and don’t know whether to leave or try more. I feel I don’t get the total care and attention I need. He acts really insecure all the time. Really weird whenever he sees me relating with other male folks. He says he loves me but I really doubt that sometimes. He wants us to remain low-key for now and not trumpet the relationship, and I don’t feel comfortable about that. He’s not introduced me to anyone close to him yet though we’re just a year and some months. He doesn’t like calling, only prefers to chat, and I’m just the other way round. He can be really possessive and authoritative sometimes. He got his heart broken by a lady who left him for someone else and he feels I’m also going to do same whenever I say I’m tired. And what I’m tired of is his behaviors, sometimes to the point of not loving him. I find it difficult to get emotionally attached to people and when I do is always hard to let go. Now I’m on a crossroads of letting go or still hanging on a little more – I don’t know. I still love him very much but this is torture. He’s not violent in anyway and can be very romantic sometimes. Please what do I do?
Hi Zynella – You bring up a lot of issues, and each is worth discussing, but I’m mostly struck by one feeling as I read your letter.  Which is that this is a guy who demands that everything be on his terms, 100% of the time.  Now I know there ... read more
Published on 2019-07-29