Gface asks: I recently had to end it with my closest, and practically only, friend. He and I have had a lot of rough patches. He was very manipulative and sometimes brutal with how he was with me emotionally. I’ve broken it off with him before, but I had decided to give him a second chance and we actually ended up dating after that. But once we did, I fell into a serious depression. It was so bad I couldn’t get out of bed or talk to anyone. So I broke it off with him. But we were surprisingly able to remain best friends and it was good for awhile. We went to prom together as friends and right after we got back together. I was happy with him for another couple of months, then things started to get hard again. I was moving 7 hours away from him, and I knew I couldn’t handle that. But quietly I had decided to wait and see how things were after I moved. I thought maybe things would get better once I got my life together. But he actually broke up with me a month after I moved. I was okay with it, I thought it was the right thing and I was actually relieved. I thought we would be able to go back as friends like we did after the first break up, but then things went downhill. He started acting like he did when we were first friends. He was getting clingy, always being manipulative and slipping in certain sentences that made me feel bad if I didn’t feel like talking or if I had even not responded to a text right away. He always got depressed if my life was too busy, and always needed my attention. But when his life was busy he was all of a sudden happy and telling me every single detail of the great day he had. It was getting too hard and I felt like I was getting dragged through the mud, so I broke it off with him. And again, I wasn’t that emotionally impaired. It was hard, but I honestly felt free. Like I could finally be okay again, with nothing to pull me down every time I got up. I even had a friend at the time to distract me while I was dealing with this. He’s actually my ex’s neighbor, and it felt kind of weird to continue talking to him after I ended it with my ex. But he was dealing with something, and so was I, so it felt like we kind of helped each other out this week. Then he suddenly got a little better, and I tried texting this guy but he’s been keeping the conversation short. I don’t know if I did something or if he only wanted to talk to me because he was dealing with something at the time. And I know he’s not ignoring me because of what happened with my ex, because we talked about it. But I keep thinking about how just a week ago he said that if I needed anything, he’d be here for me. And I helped him through a lot this week, and I now just feel like he’s ignoring me. And I literally have no one else to talk to because I don’t have any friends in my new city, and I don’t really like going to family with these situations cause they can’t really help, nor are they the best at giving me emotional support. So I don’t know how to handle my feelings right now. And I don’t know what to do to distract myself from them. I’m beginning to feel quite depressed again, and very alone.

Gface asks: I recently had to end it with my closest, and practically only, friend. He and I have had a lot of rough patches. He was very manipulative and sometimes brutal with how he was with me emotionally. I’ve broken it off with him before, but I had decided to give him a second chance and we actually ended up dating after that. But once we did, I fell into a serious depression. It was so bad I couldn’t get out of bed or talk to anyone. So I broke it off with him. But we were surprisingly able to remain best friends and it was good for awhile. We went to prom together as friends and right after we got back together. I was happy with him for another couple of months, then things started to get hard again. I was moving 7 hours away from him, and I knew I couldn’t handle that. But quietly I had decided to wait and see how things were after I moved. I thought maybe things would get better once I got my life together. But he actually broke up with me a month after I moved. I was okay with it, I thought it was the right thing and I was actually relieved. I thought we would be able to go back as friends like we did after the first break up, but then things went downhill. He started acting like he did when we were first friends. He was getting clingy, always being manipulative and slipping in certain sentences that made me feel bad if I didn’t feel like talking or if I had even not responded to a text right away. He always got depressed if my life was too busy, and always needed my attention. But when his life was busy he was all of a sudden happy and telling me every single detail of the great day he had. It was getting too hard and I felt like I was getting dragged through the mud, so I broke it off with him. And again, I wasn’t that emotionally impaired. It was hard, but I honestly felt free. Like I could finally be okay again, with nothing to pull me down every time I got up. I even had a friend at the time to distract me while I was dealing with this. He’s actually my ex’s neighbor, and it felt kind of weird to continue talking to him after I ended it with my ex. But he was dealing with something, and so was I, so it felt like we kind of helped each other out this week. Then he suddenly got a little better, and I tried texting this guy but he’s been keeping the conversation short. I don’t know if I did something or if he only wanted to talk to me because he was dealing with something at the time. And I know he’s not ignoring me because of what happened with my ex, because we talked about it. But I keep thinking about how just a week ago he said that if I needed anything, he’d be here for me. And I helped him through a lot this week, and I now just feel like he’s ignoring me. And I literally have no one else to talk to because I don’t have any friends in my new city, and I don’t really like going to family with these situations cause they can’t really help, nor are they the best at giving me emotional support. So I don’t know how to handle my feelings right now. And I don’t know what to do to distract myself from them. I’m beginning to feel quite depressed again, and very alone.
Hi Gface –     Wow I’m sorry you’re going through this. It sounds so tough.   And I don’t know why this is, but this last month seems to have been just LOADED with breakups, and particularly bad ones. People who write me, people I see around me… I ... read more
Published on 2017-10-03