Ducky asks– Hello! So I seem to be having trouble in my relationship. We have been together for 13 months and became engaged 6 months in. I told her I wasn’t ready to be engaged, as I have been married before and I’m not ready for it yet. But she got mad at me and I gave in and said she could propose. Then she wanted a baby and I told her I wasn’t ready. I feel like I’m holding her back from her life. We also argue about a lot because she says a lot of things she regrets saying and when alcohol is involved (which isn’t too often) it gets worse. She goes through my phone because she doesn’t trust who I talk to, and I have trouble letting go of the arguments we have. Which has led to resentment, lack of sexual desire, and me being a robot. I’m also having trouble being attracted to her because I’m used to being with men. We called off our engagement privately because she knew I didn’t want it yet. She is very upset about going backwards. We are now on a break because she’s tired of being with a wall, she wants me to let go of my past and be ready for a future with her and figure out my sexual desires so we can either make this work or end it before it gets too far. I’m so lost. I love her so much, I just feel like I don’t know who I am anymore. How do I figure this all out?
Hi Ducky – There’s so much in this question – way too much for one dog to be able to answer all at once (or probably even a brilliant couples therapist!). I’ll start by saying that I’m glad you two chose to put a break in your engagement, as ... read more